2.20.2003

Sam

Last night we found out that Sam, our director, will not be returning next year. He was only on a year contract, but then he was offered a one-year residency. He couldn't accept it, for both personal and professional reasons. We'll miss him a lot. I took me awhile to figure out how I felt about the whole thing. Sam and I work a little differently, but I realize that he pushes me as an actor and makes me a hell of a lot better. I'll miss that. He was/is also a great benifit to our program as a whole, and he'll leave a space that I think all of us will feel.


A Plane Crash

Speaking of which, we had a crazy experience in acting today. We worked a lot with our breath and how it connects our character to his emotions and his emotions to the outside world. We talked a lot about being "in the breath." Going off of this, Sam let all of us disperse and set up a scene in which we were waiting at the airport for someone. I automatically plugged Courtney into the equation. He made the plane crash, and then a few of us were pulled from the crowd when our loved ones were found. She lived. Most of the others didn't. It was such a powerful experience; I couldn't stop sobbing, even when I learned that she was ok. I allowed myself to be completely immersed in my character and immersed into the moment. I don't think I'll ever forget that feeling, and hopefully I'll be able to recreate it as an actor later on.


Cast of Thousands

We also discussed in class how everyone goes through a number of characters as we go through the day. Personally, I'm a different person as a boyfriend, as a friend, as an enemy, and as a child with a parent. However, it seems like I change less now that I did in high school. Back then I was a completely different person, depending on the company. Now I'm much more even, partially because I think I'm closer to who I actually am now that I have the freedom to be me. It's a nice feeling.