2006 has been a hell of a year for me. It's been an emotional battleground to say the least, from being engaged, to breakup, to second chances, to heartache, to starting in 2 new cities, from SJU to ND. I'll be starting '07 with a battle-worn, but somewhat fresh slate. Clearing it off came with a mix of sadness and relief, and I hope that it's for the best.

I've learned a lot from this year, but I hope that there will be better days ahead.

[A] final comfort that is small, but not cold: The heart is the only broken instrument that works. ~T.E. Kalem
Sometimes I have this feeling like I'm playing a part in a movie, given the amount of drama I have, especially compared to other people. Sometimes the weather even plays along. The soundtrack is a bit spotty and poorly mixed, but maybe they're working on that.


So Christmas went well; it came and went with it's usual fanfare. In a few days I'll be taking off with the 'rents to the southwest. For the time being I'm bumming around Milaca and the cities, visiting people and trying to take it easy.

I went to a reception for 1L's at a big firm in Minneapolis tonight. It was pleasant, and full of free food and drink, but I don't feel like I learned a hell of a lot from it. A little practice at elbow-rubbing never hurt anyone I suppose.

I'm feeling a bit out of sorts, and I think it's because I'm at a point where I really don't quite know what I want in the grand scheme of things. I generally try to keep my life (somewhat) simple; I figure out what I want and then I go about trying to get it. However, the whole operation breaks down when I can't quite figure out what I want. Then everything gets a little trickier. Merf. I'm also tired, which doesn't help anything. Maybe things will be clearer in the morning.


Well, I'm back at home. The traipsing about in the cities was a lot of fun; I ended up hosting a dinner party at Britt's place and cooking up some apple-cider-glazed porkchops. tasty tasty.

The past couple days have been spent bumming around home, doing some shopping with Mom and visiting with a few different people. I ducked into St. Cloud for a couple hours today to chat with Hoffman since he wasn't going to be in town for long, then returned for the family Christmas. Since the other side won't be having their xmas until monday, christmas eve will be a pretty quiet affair with just myself and the rents.

So far it's a white christmas, but just barely; we got enough snow the other day to cover the ground, but that's about it. I've been splitting wood the past couple mornings, partially to help my dad out and partially to get back down to my fighting weight. I pretty much hung up my kayak after thanksgiving for lack of time, and the eating-while-studying without any exercise leaves me pulling around a little more weight than I'd like. Oh well. I've also been reading for leisure (!). Right now I'm working on Steinbeck's East of Eden, which is going pretty well. It's nice to be able to read a book and not have to hilight and take notes.


I'm back in MN after a pleasant drive yesterday; hardly any traffic and a good audiobook to boot. I'm couchsurfing in Minneapolis and St. Paul for a couple days (give me a call if you're around) before heading home for family christmas-ey festivities. This morning I rolled out of bed late and watched Heat; I didn't leave Tom's place until noon or so. 'Twas wonderful.


I made it through the torts final (and the evening after); I am now a 1.5L. I feel pretty good about the semester; I'm still happy that I'm in law school and I enjoyed the whole ordeal. We had an ugly sweater party last night ($3 sweater from Salvation army, which wound up at the bar. I also picked up a sportcoat for a whopping $2.50). Good times were had. It's crazy to think that I really don't have anything hanging over my head now. Granted, I have to try and find a job (anybody have lawyer friends in Denver?), but other than that the break should be restful. I'm going to hang out in Mlps/st. paul for a couple days to visit people, and then head home for family functions. After new year's I'm headed south with my parents, and will stop off in Denver on my way back to MN to try to land a job.

To the other 1L's, it's been quite a ride. I've made a lot of amazing friends this semester, and now that exams are no longer an unknown evil I can only imagine that things will get better. Woot.


Law School Grading


The crim final was today. I was more worried about this one than I was about contracts or civ pro. I felt pretty well prepared (much of that preparation thanks to our study group) but the exam itself threw me a bit. I think I did fine; I ferreted out all of the main points and even a few minor subtleties, but the format was different from the standard fact pattern/issue spotter, and it took me a little while to feel like I really hit my stride.

Torts is the last one; probably the toughest in regards to subject matter, but it's the only open-book exam we have, and we have an excess of time to do it (5 hours for a 3.5 hour exam to allow for editing and travel time). Then we'll be done with our first semester of law school. IT can't come soon enough. It's been going well so far, but I'm ready to be done with exams.

Now back to my fact pattern.


Oh, and I was apparantly on the news tonight; some filler bit about the recent cold (read: actual winter) weather. I was locking up my bike and pulling off my hat at the time, and glanced over and saw a camera on a tripod. I figured it was a student news dealie; turned out it was the news guys just getting some B reel. So now I'm on a B reel.

Still biking into school, by the way, though I usually drive most other places, aside from to Annie's, Pat's, or Carla's, all of which aren't far from school. My trusty commuter fixie (with full fenders, to keep the muck off) is still doing well, though the black fenders and paint are getting a little grimy from the salt and slush. Makes her look tough though.

Also, locking up my rear wheel with my legs (yay fixie!) and skidding through the snow is a lot of fun. I took a couple laps up and down my alley the other night just to slide around.
Well, I'm out of the first final. A 3 hour ordeal, it wasn't so bad. Our class was split between our two large classrooms; I was in the less-crowded of the pair, which seemed a lot less stressful. Our first 1/2 hour was all reading, and then we could start writing (or typing, in most cases) the exam. The Student Bar Association provided earplugs, which proved to be pretty helpful, since a room full of clicking keyboards was louder than expected. The exam was complicated, but fair. I feel like I saw most of the issues and explained them clearly. I felt prepared as well; I don't think that a few more days of studying would have helped me at all, which is where I wanted to be. Afterwards, Pat and I went to the student commons and played NCAA football on the x-box and big screen that they keep tucked away in one of the little lounges so we could decompress, then headed over to Annie's for brownies, wine, and catchphrase. Tomorrow, more studying.


First substantive final tomorrow. Bring on the contracts. I feel pretty good about it, though so does just about everybody else, it seems. Hopefully all will go well.


South Bend finally looks like winter; we picked up enough snow to make everything white. It's pretty, though the bike ride to school has gotten a little chillier.

Last night our study group got together at my place to go over torts. We were sprawled out around my living room, surrounded by laptops, notes, coffee, and beer, and we eventually ordered some Chinese food and had it delivered. Though we didn't have a menu, we reasoned that most Chinese places had the same fare, and placed our orders. While kicking around law school gossip and torts hypos over take-out, I realized that the scene was, for awhile, exactly what I imagined law school to be like. Giant finals looming on the horizon, smart colleagues, and Chinese take-out.

The Civ Pro final is on Friday, and tomorrow is the last day of class of our 1L fall semester. It'll be such a relief when all of this is behind us.

On a slightly unrelated note, I've been somewhat geeking out about Google Reader lately. It's an RSS reader that reads feeds from various websites which update regularly and displays them all in one interface, saving me from skipping back and forth between blogs, news sites, etc. Now that I have my page setup, it essentially reads like my own customised newspaper. I've included feeds about stuff that I'm interested in, along with some of the comics that I like (Marmaduke explained, Get Fuzzy, Boy on a Stick and Slither). It's my new morning read.


I'm still grinding things out, and generally letting most other things (like cooking, doing dishes, etc.) fall by the wayside. A new routine has started to evolve for me: get up, drink lots of coffee, review a bit with breakfast, go to class, then meet with the study group for much of the afternoon, then head home, grab some food, and study over beer and/or tea until midnight or so. Wash, rinse, repeat.

Finals kick off in a week. I've been staying away from canned study guides for the most part, focusing my attention on my notes and condensations from our class discussions and readings and combining going over my condensations with running through old exams from our profs especially, but those from other law schools as well, to get used to the format/speed/tatics/etc. It's a big grind; there's lots of information here, and we have to not only learn the information, but learn how to apply it and play by the rules of the law-school-exam-grading-game.

I'm trying not to get too stressed about things, and I'm doing a reasonable job at it (ug, reasonable = law speek) but I'm still somewhat sick and somewhat stressed. I definately have friends who are very stressed or very sick, so things aren't all bad.

In retrospect, this semester has flown by. Someone mentioned the other day that we're all 1/6 of the way to becoming lawyers. Strange. And it's odd to think that I've been in south bend, in this house, for a semester. Still feels pretty new.

Anyway, back to contracts.


After seeing the paper chase the other day, a few of us hatched a plan. The plan was to study. At the lake. Since we're done with legal writing, we didn't have class this afternoon. After crim, we headed for New Buffalo, on Beautiful Lake Michigan. We studied torts on the way there, then got to the beach and set up chairs on the shore. In 60 degree weather we read, edited legal memos, and discussed contracts hypotheticals. Then on the way home we had a comprehensive reveiew on crim law.

It's going to snow in a couple days. The trip was amazing.

Right. Now back to studying.


Ug. Crunch time is here. Thanksgiving was nice; dinner at Dave's was a lot of fun (got to hang out with some fun Israilis. doesn't happen every day). We have our legal writing final in the works, which, while not terrible, is a lot of work. I've finished reading and briefing for the semester, and I've drafted both memos, so I'm on the ball, but it's a lot of work. And now I have to work on learning all of this. We got a practice exam question back today in torts; I hit a B or B-, not bad, but not stellar by any means.

If you see me walking around, tell me to get back to the library.


I realized yesterday that this is my second thanksgiving in a row (and ever, for that matter) away from my family. Though it looks like it'll be productive (95 page legal writing final, wooo) it is a bit sad. I'll have to make it back for Easter (and xmas, of course). I do get A family thanksgiving though; when Dave found out that I was going to be in the Bend over the break he informed me that I was going to have dinner with his family. Yay for friends!


It's been an interesting week. Busy, and, well, interesting. Thanksgiving will be take-home-final full, and I think I'll have a good time hanging out with the rest of the ex-pats stuck in south bend. It looks like I'll get to boat in 50 degree weather today too.


This is cool


Hopefully one day I can prosecute cases like this.
When I bought my laptop I picked up Dell's super service plan or whatever it's called, and it paid off today. I was getting some battery error messages and within 15 minutes I had chatted with a Dell rep online and a battery is in the mail. Impressive.

In other news, the entire 1L class seems to have the same cold, including me. Yesterday was rough, but now I'm heavily medicated and doing somewhat better. I swear, it's like a sick kindergarten class around here.


Things have been pretty crazy busy lately; lots of time in the library. There's also a cold getting passed around the law school, which I managed to catch. In addition to the growing amounts of reading, my attention has turned to job searching and to test prep, both of which manage to take up the balance of my free time.

Our study group is humming along well; muching up practice exams and allowing everyone to leave with a pretty solid understanding of what we're talking about. It's a nice base for things.

Yay for the election results.

I'm now mohawk-less.

I have been giving myself breaks every now and again, like playing Defcon (think the big board from Dr. Strangelove and thermonuclear war) and kayaking once a week or so. First exam is Friday, which marks the start of the exam set that will play a large role in shaping the next few years of my life. Yippee.


I've found a nice little spot to study in the main library on campus (touchdown jesus). There are some windows in the corners that have desks in front of them; it takes some jockying to get one, but it's worth it, especially since I've been logging a lot of library time lately. Law school has recently gotten busy. And hard.

I'm job shopping in Denver, so if you've got an opening for a law clerk, let me know.


My parents were in town this weekend, along with my aunt and uncle. It was fun; we had a big fish fry with a few of my friends (I think my parents are excited that I have friends). Everybody got into the football game, which was also fun. I went out a bit, but not very much, since I was pretty tired.

Law school is buckling down; I have a landury list of things that I need to do today, in addition to my required reading. Then there's a gathering to watch the election results come in tonight. Go Dems!

I have prayer flags in my backyard now.

I'm trying to stay fresh, but things are starting to wear on me a bit. I still don't think law school lives up to the horror stories, but there's a lot here to learn, and not a whole lot of time to learn it in. I'm working on not burning out, and this weekend definately helped, but some people seem pretty close to the brink. Our first exam is next friday, which seems to usher in the heaping pile of stress that's just around the corner.


If I die, somebody strap ice skates to my feet. Our flag football team won its first game last night.

In other news, Halloween was fun; I had sushi for the first time and dressed up as a dead Steve Irwin for the duration of the evening. A laugh, followed by "too soon," was the standard response.


A group of us sat down to watch Children of the Corn last night. Though some periods were somewhat creepy, everything past the cross exploding out of the ground was over the top. The evening degraded into something akin to MST3K. Good times though.


This made me laugh.

In other news, the weekend was pretty interesting. We had the fall ball (think Law School Homecoming Dance) on friday night in the college football hall of fame. It was nice, though not spectacular. The gathering at Carla's was a good time though, and everybody was real dressy. Afterwards, we went to the backer. Not so classy.

Yesterday was spent watching the ND game, doing a bit of costume shopping, and eventually rolling over to a Communist party at Charlie's. The premise was that everyone would wear red and bring hard liquor, which was then turned over to the community. Things went about as you would expect.

Today, homework. My back is still a little tweaked from a couple weeks ago; hopefully that will straighten itself out soon. Classes are pretty much classes, though the screws are tightening down in Civ Pro; we haven't done much in the past couple months but the class was recently kicked into overdrive when our prof carpet-bombed the back row with questions last tuesday. I kind of enjoyed our last legal writing brief (blasphemy!) since we're finally getting to argumentative writing. We have a study group that we've put together that seems to be covering a lot of ground; the 4 of us work well together and it's nice to get a second (or fourth) opinion on things.


It snowed last night, and this morning my world was full of snow and fog. I skidded my fixie down the alley, locking the rear tire up with my legs and sliding through the snow. It was wonderful.

Things have been weird lately. I'm looking for the answers to some really big questions, and I suppose the good news is that I feel like I might be closer to finding them. Gotta let things simmer for a bit though, as I realize more than most that some things can't be taken back, but others can.

We were pumpkin carving at Carla's last night. Good times.


Sometimes you can see the forest if you look through the trees.


Wow. Shane is crazy talented. Listen to "Apology" HERE.
This morning one of Pat's buddies who was in town for the weekend was MIA. Pat walked around some to see if he was passed out in someboy's yard or something; eventually we found the kid. He was in jail. So I went to go pick up Pat and we headed down to the county klink. The place looks like a high school, but with smaller windows and more razor wire. We chatted with the cop at the front desk for awhile as other people lined up to pay another officer large amounts of cash, I assume for bail. Our timing was pretty good, he was just getting out as we got there.

Turns out his fellow inmates were all pretty nice guys, most of them picked up for public intoxication or DUI's. They expressed some concern over the guy who said he was bipolar and needed his meds, but for the most part it sounds like it was a relatively pleasant stay. Though he missed breakfast, he got a full night's rest and a pretty good lunch (including pie, apparantly. good food in election years). We then went out for pizza and I dumped the boys off at O'Hara Grace.

Oh, and it turns out that a charge of Public Intoxication in St. Joseph County gets you a night in the big house, $150 bail ($170 if you make a phone call) and a court apparance, presumably for another fine. And you can't make a collect call from prison to a cell phone. Good to know.


It looks like I've been left without any paddling this weeked, save for maybe the East Race. Bad news bears. Though I may still manage to make it out of town, it looks like all of the paddlers have either bailed or are headed to KY for some class II-II+ stuff; not worth the drive. Merh.


I'm back from West Virginia, bumming around for the majority of the day and getting a bit of homework done. The trip was good; it was nice to get away from south bend for awhile, but now that I'm back for the middle of the week there's not a whole lot to do. I mean, I have plenty of schoolwork to keep me busy, but vacation-wise, most people are home or points abroad for break and won't be back until later in the week. Meh. On the bright side, I'm pumped for the green narrows and other steep creeks next weekend.

A combination of sleeping crammed in a car, on the ground, and being folded up in my little playboat for about 12 hours has left my back spasming like no other. Ouchie. I've been keeping ice on it; hopefully it'll stretch out in time for the east race on Wed.

I've been in a bit of an odd mood lately; introspective, I suppose. I've been trying to make a little better sense out of what's happened in the past year or so and where that's leaving me in the grand scheme of things. Hopefully this break will go further in clearing my head; this past week or so I've had a hell of a time paying attention in class. I feel like I'm still on top of things, but it's taking more conscious effort on my part. Running rivers was good for me; for about 12 hours this past weekend I thought about nothing else but running the river I was on. Hopefully that sort of focus will carry on to law school business.


Thank God break is here. One more class and I'm home free. It's good timing; this past week I feel like I've been fading quite a bit. I'm headed to West Virginia tonight for some paddling, and then I'll be able to lie low, get some work done, and generally loaf around for the week before heading for North Carolina next weekend. Yay for getting out of sout bend.


It's snowing today; I woke up with the grass covered with snow and my room freezing. Hello South Bend. On the bright side, the big cold front brought big waves to Lake Michigan. I'll be hitting the lake right after class, 40 degree temps nonwithstanding.


I had my first flag football game last night with "Res Ipsa This." We played in the fieldhouse which had a full artificial turf field; pretty classy for our lowly co-rec team. We lost anyway, though it was a good time. Then I got somewhat crabby for the remainder of the evening. Things brightened a bit today until I bounced a cheque; no good at all. However, it's a beautiful day, and after hanging out and chatting with some people my mood has taken a turn for the better. Time to drink a beer and read some Crim out on the porch.


This is a cute thing that made me happy.

In other news, I feel like I'm starting to plane out a bit; I'm past the excitement of law school and haven't made it to exam-freak-out yet. I may need to make myself freak out a bit more, which happened a little when talking about exams this morning. Yeesh. Back to homework.


Text from Crafty: "Dames is bad news."


A bunny eating parsley. Weird, I know, but it made me smile.
Wow. I like this a lot.

It's marmaduke. Explained. Now we just need Family Circus


Ug. Weird.

I was looking through some photos posted by a friend of mine from SJU of an upcoming theatre production. It all looked so foreign; now that they've moved into the new building all of the facilities are different. There are definately some familiar faces in the photos, but I'd say I probably didn't know about half of them. Weird.

I'll probably try and get back on campus when I head home for winter break; hopefully I'll be back there before classes are done at SJU. Otherwise I'll just have to catch up with people who are in the state and around campus. I don't know that it's completely settled in that I'm somewhat of a stranger there, and will be even more so after this year. Odd.
It looks like plans are starting to piece together for fall break; I'm headed out to the Gauley to paddle for the first weekend and see Hoffman, who should be coming out from Baltimore. The Gauley is one of the more classic american whitewater rivers, and it'll be my first introduction to rivers in the southeast, so it should be quite the trip.

Other than that, law school is cruising along. I've settled into a routine of getting to school around 9, hanging out for an hour, class and such during the day, and then heading home after class to do work on my front porch if it's warm out and in my comfey chair if it's cold, then briefing at my kitchen table. The schedule works well for me; I'm usually done with my work by 5:30 or so, which leaves my evenings pretty much free.


Another somewhat interesting weekend; some of the same-old-same-old bar hopping, combined with a come-from-behind win from ND (undeserved? maybe. overrated? quite definately). A couple buddies and I narrowly avoided getting our asses kicked by a bouncer, so that was fun. Everything was sprinkled with dashes of interpersonal drama, inserted by myself and others.

Bake for 72 hours at 500 degrees.

Serve and eat.


Today started out a bit rough, but then brightened up later on. And in a bit I'm headed off to drink scotch, play cards, and probably tell lies. Should be a fun evening.


So ND lost their 3rd game and plunged in the rankings from 2nd to 12th. Bad news; most likely out of the hunt for the national championship. So the game was not quite as fun as last weekend's.

Yesterday was also somewhat dampened by self-induced poisoning from the night before. Yeah. Headaches.

Oh, and Friday night I got to lay down a bunch of cash to get the pipes in my house cleaned out. That was a lot of fun too. Though I did vaucum today, which made me feel oddly productive. Fun stuff.

Argh. This could be one of the dullest blog posts ever.

Er, and then I found $5.


I've been elected to the NLDS Honor Council, which is the committee which convenes to investigate a honor code violation. It's a pretty sweet deal, especially since I don't have to do anything until somebody screws up. Woot.

Another game weekend, which should be fun, though I feel like I'm starting to get the cold that about half of the law school has, so I may be lying somewhat low this weekend. Boo.


So I think I now have a somewhat decent idea of what dying feels like. Last night I had a very vivid dream in which I was shot in the face. The shot flung me around and everything went dark and I could feel myself hit the ground. If real life follows suit, my last thought will be one mainly of surprise, something along the lines of "holy shit Im really dying."

Scary stuff.

Aside from the death thing, things are going well. Busy, but well.


ND football is a pretty big deal.

Yesterday ND trounced Penn State, and I attended my first ND home game. Things started early; Tom, my 1st-cousin-once-removed, was tailgating early and I stopped by for a bloody mary, then it was off to a friend's place for breakfast, and the back to the parking lot to cruise the tailgate parties. The game itself was pretty crazy; the student section was nuts, and it was pretty impressive to see 80,000 people on their feet for the big plays. ND played well, and they were a lot sharper than they were last week. The game could have easily been 41-3, but ND's second-string defense gave up a couple of touchdowns late in the game. Should be a hell of a season though, and people are already talking about the upcoming game against Michigan this coming weekend. Should be a good time.


I feel like I'm settling into the rhythm of law school. It's work, but it's not much more than a regular 9-5 job. As long as I work hard all day my evenings are pretty much free; I managed to get out paddling tonight and will hopefully get down to the east race again tomorrow. The class is starting to move toward cliques, which I suppose is to be expected. So far I've been moving pretty freely between the tribes, but I feel like I do so more than most people do. I like it, anyway.


There's a cardinal outside of my window right now.

Today was supposed to be paddling, but turned into mostly homework. Meh.

This morning, as with most Saturday and Sunday mornings (well, just barely afternoon, today), Robbie and I had our standard debriefing, where we both rehash the events of the night before. The event has become somewhat of a ritual, and I look forward to it quite a bit. Not sure if they'll become somewhat more mundane once we know our classmates a little better, but at the moment there's just about always something new to go over. Fun stuff.

Right. Time for dinner.


Conversation this morning:

"How ya doing Jake?"
"I feel about how I deserve to."



Herm, seems I've gotten another bump on xoxo. I'm trying to keep myself from reading the forum, as I'm pretty sure it's not good for me. I think I'll try to focus on caring about people who don't hide behind forum handles for the time being.


Well, I've lived through the first week (and weekend) of law school. Things have been busy, but not too terrible, and I've managed to get a couple days ahead in my reading, so if one afternoon I just crash and do nothing I have a little bit of slack. The message board discussion on xoxo has pretty much quieted down, though I noticed today that someone posted a link to this blog on it. That's fine, I suppose; I read through some other threads on the site and realized that, though it offers some good advice, most of the threads reinforce all of the negative stereotypes about law school students. Most will trash talk any school not in the top 14, and come off as being greedy, elitists who care for little else than landing a high paying job at a big firm.

I like the idea of a national law school forum, but I'm pretty disappointed in the end result.

On the other hand, I've been impressed with the makeup of our 1L class. Granted, it's not particularly diverse by any stretch of the imagination, but on the whole it seems like it's made up of nice, genuine people.

People are already grinding out rumors and measuring themselves against each other though. I wore my hair down on Friday, and apparently word was going around that it was because I had a meeting with the dean. Not true, by the way. I was also asked how much I'd been studying by a classmate; he had heard that some 1L's were studying 10 or 12 hours a day (I've been putting in about 4-5hrs/day). I told him not to lose too much sleep about it.

Anyway, back to contracts...


My hair has now become an issue of national discussion.

Apparantly a 2L or 3L at ND put up a post on a national college/grad/law message board 2 days ago, telling me to cut my hair and that he wanted to punch me in the face. Then 140-some other people chimed in, including myself.


The next survivor will be grouped by race, which should be interesting.
Today was a pretty good day; I understood the lion's share of my readings and I even fixed my plumbing (woo woo!).

I offered up an opinion in class today and got my just desserts; I was instructed to take a set of facts that ran against a defendant and defend him in class on Friday. I'll be fighting, by definition, a losing battle, but I am to demonstrate what all great lawyers should be able to do, which is take a set of facts that seemingly run against their client and turn them in their favor. Should be interesting; I figure that as long as I know the case and make some good arguments without backing down I'll win some points with my Contracts prof. Should be a good time.

Oh, and we got a speech today about the honor code that we're all bound by. Unmarried sex, along with intoxication and cheating, are all violations of the honor code. Awesome.


I met the scary 1L prof. today. In their opening remarks, most profs said that you should be prepared, but that if you are, then everything is going to be fine, generally dispelling the terrible stories of hard-ass 1L profs. Then we ran into one who had no desire in dispelling these stories. I'm paraphrasing a bit here, but he told us that if we weren't prepared then we shouldn't waste his time in coming to class, and that despite what we had been told there are dumb questions and that if you ask them he'll roll his eyes and blow you off. Awesome.

I had 4 classes today and probably another 4-5 hrs of reading, if not more. Law school is a lot of work, but I'm liking it so far. I'd be having a much better day if I hadn't tried to fix our leaky faucet. After 4 hours and 3 trips to the hardware store, it's now equally leaky, though now it's steady instead of intermittant. Christ.


So I've been officially orientated into law school; tomorrow is the first day. The mohawk has gone over well (for the most part), it's made me into somewhat of a minor celebrity. Most people manage to remember my name the first time around.

The class is (relatively) big (200 students). Everybody seems pretty nice though; I haven't met anyone who has immediately struck me as a jerk. Hopefully that doesn't mean that I'm the jerk. I'm pretty sure our schedules will be changing pretty soon, as this past week has been a lot of fun, but it's tough to do well in law school if you're waking up at 1pm.

Law school books are big. And heavy. And expensive.

I've been biking all over, which has been fun.

I think I'm going to like law school.


Things have been going well in South Bend; Robbie and I are both settled in and getting along well; Tim should get in sometime this evening. Last night I oranized a bar meeting for incoming 1Ls who were on the same schedule as Robbie and I; all moved in and with nothing to do. 15% of our class showed up. It was a good time. Tonight we're hosting a BBQ to get better acquainted with our incoming class.

Other than that things have been pretty low key; all of the projects at the house are done, and I've been getting in some paddling, which has been really fun; I love the course here. I guess that's about it for now; we were emailed our first assingment for Torts already. Yay.


Well, I now have internet in the south bend house. Things are pretty well settled in; the place already feels like a home (probably somewhat due to the fact that I've unpacked just about everything I own into it). After about a week's worth of projects I also officially feel like a homeowner. Fortunately, all of the projects and unpacking have been finished, and all I have to do is hang up a few more posters and I'm done. Feels good.

One of the housemates is already here and almost moved in, the other will be showing up in the middle of next week. Seems like a good crew and like it will be a good place to live; now I'm going to go on a bike ride to explore the neighborhood.


Things have been going all right at home, but it's time to get out of here. Tonight I'm headed down to the cities to hang out with the boys, tomorrow Tim gets married (yeeks) and Sunday mom and I drive down to South Bend. Dad is already heading down there tonight with a horse trailer full of furniture and stuff, and the three of us will work on the place until Thursday or so. Then I've got about a week before orientation for law school starts.

So yeah. Off to another adventure.


Had a good weekend; hung out with some fun people and got quite a bit of packing done. Stayed cool for the most part (today is the 9th consecutive day over 90 degrees. yeeks). I'll see quite a few people at Tim's wedding, but other than that, I'm doing a lot of "wow, I'll see you.... sometime." Scary stuff.

I'm getting anxious to get to South Bend and get set up. I feel like these next few days of work are going to feel long.

My fleet of bikes has now been reduced to 3, all of which are traveling with me to South Bend. All told, I've built up six bikes, kept two, and made $100. Cool.

After Courtney headed home we've been friends for the most part, staying in contact and chatting online or email every few days. Today she told me that she can't talk to me for awhile until she can properly think of me as a friend. I understand, but it's tough. Hopefully we can eventually be friends again.


The bike I built up for Crafty. Pretty lugwork, if I do say so myself.

My Raleigh Pursuit fixie. With spinny pig valve cover.

The 'haw, up.



The new 'hawk, in the "downish" position.

jake's mohawk 7-28-06

jake's mohawk 2 7-28-06


Sparrow Aviation Administration Blames Collision On Failure To Detect Pane Of Glass

I was amused.
Bike building is going well; I've got a couple hours left on Craft's bike, and then it's time to start painting up my new frame. Had a pretty sucessful salvage run last night, though I'm going to have to offload a ton of crappy wheels and frames when I'm done with all of this.

I'm still trying to figure out what to do this weekend; there is a freestyle competition going on at Wausau, but I may just stick around the cities, visit people, and pack. I'm going to a Spencer concert early tomorrow evening, so I wouldn't want to go to Wausau until Saturday; we'll see how carpools work out.

Oh, and I have a mohawk now. Yay.


This is a massive QT video of a sony commercial. It rocks my world.
Went to the Poetry Idol slam last night. It was my last slam in MN for a long while, which made it a little bittersweet. I didn’t score high enough in the 2nd round to make it to the 3rd, which made me sad. Then Ryan K was the first poet in the last round. He took the stage and asked if I had made it or not. When he learned I hadn’t, he stepped down and allowed me to take his place so I could slam one of my own poems (the previous rounds had been bad poetry and a cover, respectively) in my last slam.

Thanks Ryan.

I was surprised at how sad I was when I was saying goodbye to all of the slam people; after a few months of being around them once a week I really felt like I belonged. When I first started slamming in the cities I felt like I was the outsider; just in awe of all of these poets. At the end I felt like one of them. I’ll miss you guys.

I rode home on my Pursuit (now a fixie) and went back to building bikes. I’ve got two for sale at the moment, a Vintage Schwinn Cruiser and a C.Itoh single speed road bike. Hopefully they’ll both sell soon. I’ve finished painting Craft’s creation; I’ll try to get photos up sometime soon. She’s pretty. Now I’m just moseying through the afternoon and waiting to head home and start building up the freshly painted frame.


This scares me a lot.

In other news, it's been more bike building and fixing. Almost got hit by a hailstorm on my way back from work yesterday. Then Craft and I were walking my Raleigh to the bike shop to pick up my Klein so we could both ride back, and I rolled over a thumbtack. When I patched the tire in the public bikeshop it goo-ed off the rim, allowing the 100psi tube to sneak out, then explode. It was real loud.

I'm painting and building like mad now; I'd like to sell off a couple bikes to finance this addiction, and I'm building up a bike for Craft. Got to hurry though, as I leave the cities next Tues.


I have one less bike and one more messenger bag. Good trade.

The weekend was a lot of fun; the boys went up to Lahti's cabin for Tim's pseudo-bachelor party (pseudo = no strippers). A good time was had by all.

Now I'm back to fiddling with bikes; a trip to One-On-One for a tool and lunch found me spending $50 on soup and bike parts. Yay for addictions.


I have 6 bikes now, though hopefully they'll be pared down considerabaly next week.

1. My Klein aluminum mountain bike. They make some of the best frames on the planet. I like this bike a lot.

2. Raleigh Pursuit; vinatage road bike setup as a single speed at the moment, but will soon be converted to a fixie. Gold/black paint scheme; really pretty.

3. Gitane fixie; the one I just finished. I'm working on selling this one, as it's a blast to ride but it's way to big for me. It's like getting on a horse.

4. Schwinn Cruiser. Just picked this one up last night (free, woo!) and built it up. Still needs pedals, but other than that she's finished. She'll be my lousy weather commuter in south bend.

5. Ross Flat Bar Road Bike. My first project, which will hopefully be sold tonight to make room in the stables.

6. C.Itoh Road Bike. A tank of a frame made by a subsidary of Bridgestone, this was purchased ($10) mainly for parts. It had really pretty 1/4 fenders, and some of the parts were cannibalized to finish the Schwinn. I'll probably finish stripping the parts and then offload the frame.

Anyway, that's the stable for the moment.


I finished building up another bike last night, a Gitane fixie (fixies are like single speeds but without freewheels; the rear cog is attatched directly to the rear wheel, so whenever the pedals turn, the wheel turns, and vice-versa, makes riding quite a bit different). For about $20 ($15 for a rear cog and $5 for a new tube) I managed to scrounge and fashion myself a beautiful bike.



So Courtney is back in LA; I told her Wednesday night that I had to go to South Bend without her, and she flew out early Friday morning. It was a tough decision but I think things are going to work out for the best; right now the timing just doesn’t work out; it’s too close to my being hurt and too close with having to deal with law school. It was all the tougher since things were going well between us.

In the end, things worked out between us better than I expected. She understandably took it hard on Wednesday night, but on Thursday we got together again to talk things over. She seemed to understand where I was coming from and why I had to take this step on my own. I still think she was incredibly brave for coming out here, and I think that her decision to come to MN gives us a chance at making things work in the future if we both want them to. We’re friends for the time being, but who knows what will happen in the future.

So yeah, off to South Bend solo in about three weeks. It’s pretty scary/exciting, especially with the new house and all (hopefully the pipes will be in it when I move in).

Aside from that, I’ve been tinkering with bikes and trying to stay cool; Fokken and I went to go see A Scanner Darkly last night (pretty good movie, really beautiful, and in a wonderfully air-conditioned theatre), and when we walked outside it felt like walking into a swimming pool. Hopefully the humidity will drop sometime in the near future.


I've made up my mind, for better or for worse.


I've been building up some bikes recently; I just finished a really pretty Raleigh single speed that, when the dust settled, cost me $10. Courtney and I are going to the 30 seconds to mars/the audition show tonight at 1st Ave; should be a good time. Things are going well between us, suprisingly well, actually, but I still have no idea what I want to do about moving to South Bend and everything. *sigh*


So I'll be attending Notre Dame Law this fall (still). I had a big sit-down with the parents and it turns out that their whole financial future was based around the idea that I'll graduate summer of '09; they're both retiring then, etc. etc. As I don't want to screw with their plans too much, I'll still be enrolling.

Oh, and here's me in a dress:


After a short hiatus up at the lake from all of the craziness, the craziness returns in full force. I went to the poetry slam at the Artist’s Quarter on Mon. night. It went pretty well and I got 2nd ($10, woo woo!), then promptly got a flat on my bike at midnight in downtown St. Paul. I fortunately snagged a ride home (thanks Tom!).

Then yesterday I met up with Courtney for the first time since the breakup. Things went surprisingly well, and, though complicated, we seem to have a friendly relationship.

Today I got a call from Notre Dame and found out that they’re offering me an extra $10k/year if I decide to defer for a year, which would put the entire offer only a few thousand dollars per year away from a full ride. It would be an easy choice if it weren’t for the house in South Bend; we haven’t closed yet, so if it falls over or something I’ll probably take a year off. Things being as they are though, I’ve got to occupy the house for things to work out, and taking a year off in South Bend doesn’t sound like much fun. *sigh*

Back into the fray…


Clearly, nothing in my life can be simple.

Yeah, my relationships are messed up, but hey, who's isn't? I can't even go get groceries without some debacle that transpires when my newly converted single-speed's chain loosens, jumps to a bigger cog which then wrenches the wheel into the side of the frame and bending the axle, leaving me stranded three miles from home with a messanger bag full of groceries and a toe that's bleeding from trying to kick the wheel back into place. I walked home in the dark with a sandal full of blood. Yay me.

Then I can't close on my house in south bend because someone broke in and STOLE THE FREAKING COPPER PIPES! The meth kids must be pretty hard up for cash in 'ol South Bend. Super. Just super.


Yep, I'm definately really good at updating lately.

Oh, let's see, I was in Canada two weeks ago, paddling the big water up there with Dennis. It was a good trip, and hopefully I’ll have a trip report up on the paddling blog sometime in the near future.

Work has been work; now that we’re done with my big project I’m mainly grinding out settlement demands, though I get thrown the occasional interesting loop every now and again. Sometimes I really enjoy copying or Bates stamping documents (stamping a whole bunch of exhibits in sequential order), which makes me wonder if maybe I’m more cut out for factory work than all of this law business.

I’ve been hitting poetry slams and open mics, which has been really fun, and I feel like I’m starting to earn some respect from some of the poets that I’ve been admiring at all of the SJU slams, which is pretty cool. Last Tues. was the chick slam, where you had to either be a girl or dressed like one to compete. The terrible picture is attached (though I think the barette adds a lot). I’ve been writing a lot of new pieces, which I think is good for me.

Last weekend was my grandparents’ 60th Anniversary Party. I was up in St. Cloud to do a little shopping and see some friends. The party was good; it was fun to see some relatives I don’t get to see much and hang out with my family. This weekend I’m headed to the lake for the weekend, and tomorrow we’re set to close on the house in South Bend. Pretty exciting.

Courtney flies in on Monday, which I’m somewhat apprehensive about. I’m really not sure how things are going to go, but it definitely won’t be a boring summer.

I turned my road bike into a single speed, and I think I’ll be spending a good portion of the rest of the summer fiddling with bikes. I did a lot of work on them in high school and really enjoyed it, but then at SJU there wasn’t much need or opportunity to work on them. Now there is again, since I’m traveling just about everywhere by bike. My Klein needs a new bottom bracket, I need a new stem on my single-speed, and I think I still want to build up a fixed-gear. Then, who knows, maybe I’ll just salvage what I can from scrap bikes, build them up, and sell them. Seems like a fun way to spend an evening.


So I've been working a lot lately on not trying to hard to plan things out too far in advance. I mean, I still plan on doing things, like going to my grandparents' anniversary party this weekend, and I still know that I'm going to South Bend this fall, but for the most part I've been trying to avoid putting together any grandiose life plans. It's a lot of work, and I've come to realize that things rarely work out the way I expect them to. So I've stopped wasting time expecting them to do... well... just about anything.

I've been trying to comfort a friend (I know, again with the vagueness) from about 1000 miles away the past couple days, and it's tough. Though I'm always a big fan of emails (speaking of, you should email me), I've never been much of one for phone conversations, and emails are pretty impresonal for these sorts of matters. I'd rather be there in person to lend support, but alas, I can't be. *sigh* Anyway, hopefully I can be of some solace.
So I've been working a lot lately on not trying to hard to plan things out too far in advance. I mean, I still plan on doing things, like going to my grandparents' anniversary party this weekend, and I still know that I'm going to South Bend this fall, but for the most part I've been trying to avoid putting together any grandiose life plans. It's a lot of work, and I've come to realize that things rarely work out the way I expect them to. So I've stopped wasting time expecting them to do... well... just about anything.

I've been trying to comfort a friend (I know, again with the vagueness) from about 1000 miles away the past couple days, and it's tough. Though I'm always a big fan of emails (speaking of, you should email me), I've never been much of one for phone conversations, and emails are pretty impresonal for these sorts of matters. I'd rather be there in person to lend support, but alas, I can't be. *sigh* Anyway, hopefully I can be of some solace.
Some friends of mine were in a Theatre Lumina play (and directed the play, actually) last night at Bryant Lake Bowl called The Accident. It was really excellent; I count myself lucky to have such talented friends.

I was in Canada over the weekend (I'll have an addition to the paddling blog when I've uploaded the photos) and it was a good trip. This week it looks like I'll be keeping myself pleasantly busy, though now that I'm done with my major project at work I'm just sort of grinding stuff out.

Things are getting situated with the house in South Bend; I'm really excited to have my own house (even though I won't have it to myself).

Oh, and I had a very pleasant night bike ride last night coming back from Bryant Lake. Long enough to be a workout but not a slog.


Just got back from a slam at Kieran's; things are going well; I got 3rd last week at the artist's quarter and 2nd tonight, and though you can't give too much credit to the scores, it is nice to do well.

Things are moving right along; drama continues to sort of swirl around me, though it doesn't really faze me. Most of it is actually quite a bit of fun, so... yeah.

Looks like I'm headed to Canada on Thursday for some big-water paddling; should be fun.


Crimany, so the story of my life continues to be complicated. It's like the O.C. around here; I really don't have to watch TV anymore, as the storylines are all pretty mundane.

The boilerplate version is this: my now-ex-fiancee has a one-way ticket to MN for July 3rd. It's a little exciting, a little scary, and a little bit lots of other things. Wow. Should be an exciting summer anyway.


Diet coke and mentos. Freaking cool.


My my. I'm going to be vague again, but it's really been a thrill-a-minute around here. Work has been going well; I get to go on my first business trip next weekend (though unfortunately it's to Omaha). Most of the drama has been on the romantic side of things; of which I don't think I'll go into details at the moment. Suffice to say that things are good. Dramatic, but good.


Ok, I'll play...

1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
gah, all of them

2. Favorite Place to eat a romantic Dinner?
I'm quickly becoming a fan of the Loring Pasta Bar

3. Last time you Puked from Drinking?
freaking Sal's with their $7, all you can drink cover. I guess that was about a month ago.

4. When is the last time you got drunk and woke up in a strange place?
Not sure about this one, actually. And it depends on what you call "strange"...

5. Name of your First Grade Teacher?
mrs. anderson. I think.

6. What do you really want to be doing right now?
what, you mean anything? probably something to do with girls.

7. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
a cowboy. definately a cowboy.

8.How many colleges did you attend before you settled on the one you graduated from?
none; SJU all the way. Though there was quite a bit of shopping to do before I settled on Notre Dame

9. Why did you wear the shirt that you have on right now?
It was the least wrinkley of my dress shirts

10. Gas Prices! First Thought?
I'm glad I'm riding my bike a lot this summer

11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you, where would you move?
Maybe back to NZ; but I'm not particularly settled on any piece of geography this morning

12. First Thought When the alarm went off this morning?
gah. early.

13. Last thought before Falling asleep last night?
i was thinking about how the rain cooled everything off and that my room was quite comfortable

14. favorite style of Underwear?

15. Favorite style of Underwear for the opposite sex?
er, my mom reads this blog.

16. What Errand/Chore do you despise?
I don't like taking out trash very much

17. If you didnt have to work would you?
I would work 2 or 3 days a week; maybe some freelance or part-time stuff

18. Sex or Sleep?
again. mom reads this. though probably the former

19. Your Favorite Cartoon Character?
the pilot from Tail Spin

20. Favorite non sexual thing to do at night with a girl/boy?
have adventures

21. A secret that you wouldnt mind everyone knowing?
wha? if I wouldn't mind everyone knowing, then it wouldn't very well be a secret, now would it?

22. What was your First Car?
'86 Olds Calais, my faithful companion for about 70,000 miles.

23. Your Best Your Mamma Joke?

24. Your Favorite Lunch Meat?
ham, granting that it's real ham and not the vacum packed variety

25. What do you get everytime you go into a WAWA (7-11 for all of you who aren't hicks --er)?
buy gas, pee, get back onto the huge road trip

26. Beach Or shore?

27. Do you think Marriage is an outdated ritual that was invented by people who died at 20?

28. Who do you Stalk?
I facebook stalk the occasional friend or pseudo friend, just to figure out what makes them tick

29. Favorite Guilty Pleasure?
easily the O.C.

30. Favorite Movie you wouldnt want anyone to find out about?
Stupid question. This is a blog. see above for my secret answer

31. What's your drink?
a caucasian or stout if it's just one, a red beer if it's a few, and whiskey or rum on the rocks if it's a lot

32. Cowboys or Indians?

33. Cops or Robbers?
robber; much more fun. everybody wants to succeed in a heist.

34. Do you cheer for the bad guys?
occasionally, but it depends what sort of bad they are

35. What Hollyood Star do you think resembles you best?
Jake Gyllanhall

34. If you had to pick one cast member of Lost, who would you be?
I haven't the slightest clue

37. What do you want when you are sick?
7Up and bad movies

38. Who from High School would you like to run into?
Jen Hallstead

41. Stifler or Oz?
Oz; I'm the nice guy too

42. Norm or Cliff?
hmmm, norm i guess. I wish I could hang out with the guy.

43. The Cosby Show or the Simpsons?
Simpsons, cosby annoys me

44. Worst Relationship Mistake that you wish you could take back?
I plead the 5th

45. Do you Like the Person who sits directly across from you at work?
I sit across from a wall usually, or from big windows if I camp out in the conference room. So no and yes, respectively

46. If you could get away with it who would you kill?
I think his name is Paul

47. What Famous person would you like to have dinner with?
Kelly McDonald. so hot.

48. What famous Person would you like to sleep with?
se above

49. Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purpose?

50. Last book you read for real?
One-L, the quintessential book on the first year of law school

51. Do you have a teddy bear?
not really

52. Strangest Place you have ever had sex?
again, mom reads the blog

54. How many times a day do you text?

55. at this point in your life would you rather start a new career or relationship?
Looks like it's the career

56. Do you go to church?
not really; I make appearances with the family but that's about it

57. Pencil or Pen?
Pen, and I'm quite particular. I like my fountain pens a lot, but otherwise it should be a direct ink feed like Pilots or some rollerballs.

58. Describe your favorite Day?
wake up with someone amazing, lay around bed for awhile, have a lazy breakfast, go on some sort of adventure in the afternoon full of great conversations, cook a large, impressive dinner, then have a fire and watch the sun set over some large body of water

59. Personal best record for number of times you pleasured yourself in a day?
pleading the 5th again

60. Personal best record for number of times you've had sex in a day?
see above

61. who do u fancy:
see above

62.If you could go back and change one thing thing since New Years what would it be???
oh, that one's pretty clear. the whole finals week debacle

63.If u could be anything...what would u want to be?


It's crazy, when I try to be cryptic the one person who sees right through it is my dad (hi dad.).


So, the homeowner thing has been only part of the whirlwind that's been around me lately. I managed to take two days off of work before I even started to see some really important people and to try and figure out where I'm at in the grand scheme of things. I suppose the most surprising thing is that I think it actually worked.

Anyway, I'm running on about three hours of sleep, so I'll have to remain somewhat cryptic for the time being. Suffice it to say that I've started adding to my Triscut box list of things that make me happy, and it's been quite some time since that's happened.


Our counter-offer to their counter-offer was accepted; I'm now a homeowner. Weird.


I'm back in Minneapolis; I put an offer on a house in South Bend, which felt really bizarre and adult. The drive home was kind of long, but Crafty came over last night and we tried out the outdoor fireplace I built the other day, which, surprisingly enough, worked quite well. Today Zoe and I are headed to Keirsa's grad party, then we all may go out afterwards. Woot.


So yesterday I spent the better part of the morning getting my desktop and laptop networked, but when that finally worked I was able to transfer all sorts of files onto the new laptop. Then I took a bike ride around Dinkytown and eastern Minneapolis to figure out just where everything was at. It was nice; I'm amazed at how close I am to everything. After lunch with a book (one-L, the quintessential 1st year law student novel) I went kayaking on the Vermillion (100 cfs, nothing too crazy) and then when I got back to the house I started to work on the back yard. The back yard of the house, about the size of a large bedroom, looked like a vacant lot, with a crappy fire ring and random debris floating around. I cleaned up the trash, then arranged the leftover bricks and flagstones into an outdoor fireplace, which will hopefully work. After that one of the housemates invited some people over and I was able to meet half a dozen or so pretty cool people. Good times.

Now I'm in South Bend; my parents and I drove here all day, and then in the evening looked at the outsides of a couple of houses before stopping by Fiddler's Hearth for dinner. They had an acoustic open mic night that was amazing; lots of really talented musicians. Tomorrow we house hunt.


I moved into Dinkytown today; the place is pretty nice, and I've got a big room and nice roommates. Fokken came over to help me move in, then we went out for dinner and drinks in Dinkytown. When we were at Loring pasta bar and ordering drinks we commented that I was the indecicive one and he was the picky one; our waitress commented that that must be why we make a good cou... pair. Granted, it was two guys out for a candle-lit dinner at a pseudo-yuppie place in Dinkytown. Later she wandered in while Tom was uttering the phrase "dick shots," and I picked up the tab. Fun stuff.

Anyway, it's good to be moved in; my new laptop came today so I've been playing around with that and trying to get files transferred between my computers. Oh, and I got my car stuck in the mud at home today and Dad had to come home during lunch to pull it out. All in all it's been a full day.


All right, so, as you can probably imagine, quite a bit has been going on in the past few weeks. I guess I'll start with the highlights, as I have a lot of ground to cover.

A week ago Friday, Courtney and I broke up. Things had been on the rocks for awhile, and after a week or so of being somewhere in limbo between being together and breaking apart, we broke it off. It definately wasn't a mutual sort of agreement, at least at first. I was devestated, but eventually came around to see that it may be the best thing for us in the long run, regardless of how things work out. Maybe we'll get back together eventually, but for now, we're apart. Hopefully this better explains some of my other cryptic quotes. Everyone, both friends and family, have been supportive through everything. In dealing with all of this, I realize that when going through something emotional like this I like to have people's understanding, but sympathy really gets me no where (i.e. "this must be really hard.."). I appreciate it, but I really don't know what to do with it. Anyway.

Finals week was pretty rough, but by wednesday or so I kind of had my head wrapped around things. Of course, my plans changed for the summer; I quickly secured a job at a firm in Minneapolis and a place to sublet in Dinkytown for the summer, both of which worked otu extremely well. I'll be moving down there tomorrow in my new car, which my parents and I got from my aunt for a song, it's a 2000 Saturn Wagon; perfect for people and gear and gas mileage.

Then on Wednesday my parents and I are headed to South Bend to look at houses, which should be exciting. I may be a homeowner soon, which seems really bizarre, I suppose because it is.

I graduated from St. John's University today, which was quite the experience. It was crazy to see all of my classmates in one place in our robes, and to see all of the professors file in wearing all of their academic regalia. I graduated magna cum laude with All-College Honors and Distinction in English, all of which was pretty cool. The ceremony was nice, though long, and when I left I was a graduate of St. John's.

It hasn't quite set in yet that it's over, even though I'm all moved out of my apartment and my friends have dispersed. Quite a few of them will either be in the cities or in St. Cloud over the summer, so I'll be able to see them quite a bit. Over the past couple of days things have really started to look up; I've been solidifying bonds with people and I'm looking forward to the days and weeks ahead.


Though it's a little bit tinfoil hat, Loose Change is a pretty interesting look at the conspiracy theory side of 911. I'm not quite sure what I think about it yet.


So I should be able to do a thumbnail sketch of everything that's going on in my life pretty soon, but I can't hande it just yet. I don't think I have my mind wrapped around everything to adaquetly report it. Suffice to say that it's too complicated to fit in a pop song or a blog post. The scheduling details, the paper final result I suppose, is that I'll graduate in a week, look at (and probably buy) a house in south bend, then return to MN, sublet a room or an apartment, and work in Minneapolis for the summer, then head to South Bend for law school in the fall. So here we are.


Shane Hawley

Because sometimes the lyrics spill like big secrets always seem to
And here we go again pretending this isn’t about you
But if there is ever a question if I had a muse
Let it be said that I am inspired by everything you do

And in these words pray find the truths
That Santa Claus will never leave you
That hope is real
That if you wanted it hard enough then he would meet you
That parents only lie as a way to show they care
And if you try you’ll be rewarded for the good you do each year

And let’s just make it crystal clear
That when we talk about all of the chances that we miss
They were something we can’t live without but have to anyway
And slowly struggle forward
With a cloud above our heads and the weight of the world on our shoulders

Because maybe things aren’t perfect
Maybe you’re still leaving
Maybe I was stupid and maybe you’re deceiving
But it’s been a long time since I’ve said I love you softly
So close your eyes a little tighter now
This microphone’s exhausting and I rarely get to use it without screaming
Like I rarely see you happy without dreaming
Because we’re living in this world of anymore
Like things aren’t perfect anymore
Like anymore melancholy and we call it quits
Like things aren’t perfect anymore and how quickly we forget
And let’s not go and talk like I’m the greatest ever
Like you’re an angel sent from heaven ‘cause we’re not
I’m a five foot nothing idiot who’s putting on some weight
And you’re an indecisive psych major who’s really fuckin’ hot
And for today, that’s still okay

Because tomorrow may not come
Maybe on earth’s other side tonight aliens eat the sun
And we forever dance this day in a slow spin
Near two years from the beginning and twenty minutes from the end
Because this is how I want to go out
No one chanting along no one looking to shout
Because if this is the end then it’s muted in smoky rooms
With the gentle hiss of PA speakers overpowering doom
And I will cling to childish hope
That if no one ever hears it
It isn’t real
That love is often better than appearances

Because sometimes the lyrics spill like milk across the table
But don’t cry
Just pretend that no one notices
We’ll be able to make it through blindfolded
Feeling for the future
Stumbling towards yesterday’s memories
And if you were happier now
I’d try to take you with me
To that place that I’ve created deep inside my psyche
Where reality melts down into multicolored fantasies
And we easily recussitate the everyday life casualities
Like you and me
In the face of practiciality
And the fact that neither one of us knows just where we might be a year or two from now
I hear you laughing
In a future I’m pretty sure I’ll never get to see

So for today
I will whisper you well wishes
Tell you sweetly we were worth it after all
Hope that one day somehow this makes sense
And blow you kisses as the fact that I still love you
Softly echoes off these walls


Things are happening way to freaking fast right now. I really can't manage anything coherant. I'll try and get back to this when I have something meaningful to say.


I had quite the weekend. Saw Hamlet at the Gutherie (last show before they move to a new theatre) which was good, though the 2nd act was much better than the 1st, and a guy behind us started snoring about 5 lines into the "to be or not to be" soliloquoy.

I got new glasses (yippee! the other pair was 9 years old) and paddled the rest of the weekend (details http://www.paddlehard.blogspot.com. The highlights included Ilgen Falls, a 30-35 footer, depending on what tape measure you're using, as well as some other great whitewater. Really fun.

Now it's just 2 more weeks of school before finals. Weird.


This gas map is pretty cool.

In other news, Al Franken was on campus last night. I saw him for free and was in the third row or so. It was interesting; a mix of jokes and political commentary, and he may even run for a MN Senate seat, which would be pretty exciting.


Easter Weekend went well, aside from my car breaking down a couple times (though I may have a new one soon). Put in docks up at the lake, did some homework, and then went paddling on friday and saturday (the trip report is on my paddling blog). On Sunday we went down to see one side of the family in Mankato and the other family in Victoria; Gina brought some wines from a wine tasting to the Skud gathering, so that was a lot of fun. Then today I'm back at school (for just a few more weeks!).


Things have been busy; I defended my thesis yesterday, which went really well. This past weekend Courtney flew out for a few days so we could reconnect; it's been tough being apart from her for basically a year, but I'll be headed out to California for the summer, especially since I've landed a job at that law firm. Other than that nothing is too exciting; paddling and family time this weekend, and only one month left of school (!).


It's been a hell of a week.

Personal issues aside, this past weekend Dad and I roadtripped to Notre Dame to visit the campus. Had a good, quick trip; the campus is, if anything, prettier than St. John's. Found some apartments I liked too, and signed away my next three years and my first deposit. Happy with everything, we returned home to find a letter from UCLA, who had admitted me but not wanted to give me any money. Turns out they just offered me the Dean's Scholarship, which put UCLA even, money-wise, with Notre Dame. After some soul-searching I realized that ND seemed to fit me better and it'll probably give me more options after graduation (not just on the west coast like UCLA) so I'll stick with ND. They may even give me more money. So yeah, I'm off to law school at Notre Dame.

I looked at the housing market in South Bend, and it looks like it may be cheaper to buy a house than to rent. You can get a house easily for $20k, and I even saw some for $8k-$10k. Crazygonuts. I emaild ND's housing office to ask about what was wrong with all of these places, since it's not like there's just one dive that's cheap, but literally dozens of houses in the price range. A payment on a place like that would be around $100/month. Weird stuff.

Also, today I got a phone call from the law firm who interviewed me in California; they want to hire me for the summer, full time, at $13/hr. I should go buy a freaking lottery ticket.

Courtney is coming up for the weekend, so that's pretty exciting. I'm headed down to the cities tomorrow night and then I'll pick her up at the airport friday morning. Woot.


I paddled today, then Hoffman and I had dinner with my dad, and then my parents came to see the play. The show went well, though it was a really small audience, which is tough with a comedy. At one point Erin dropped a spoon, and all I could think was spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon spoon until she picked it up. Strange how that works.

Oh, and things seem to be on the mend. Here's hoping.
Everything is a little different now. Things were terrible, but they're quickly improving, and I cling to the hope that they'll eventually be better than ever.

I'm sorry this is so vague.

To my drinking buddies, confidants, therapists, and friends, thank you all. I've seen/heard/felt/done some pretty amazing things over the past couple days, and I've changed a bit because of them. Anyway, thanks.


The play opens this weekend, so props-mastering has gotten to be just about a full-time job; I was in the shop for over 10 hours on Monday. Once it opens though I'm pretty much out of the woods unless something breaks, so that's something to look forward to.

I also judged what will probably be my last speech meet last night; sub-sections at Fergus Falls. Not many great speakers; most were decidedly mediocre.

Anyway, things are pretty busy at the moment, but on Saturday I get to run down to Hastings for a MN paddle expo, which should be a good time. I can't wait until Saulk Rapids opens up.


I saw 3 robins today. Maybe spring is here.
The CSB/SJU poetry slam is this week; should be a good time, and I encourage everybody to go. It's at the pub, 7pm on Sunday the 19th (this sunday). Things have been busy around here, trying to figure out where I want to go to law school (and what I want to do with the rest of my life), finishing up props for the play (I was making cigars look lit yesterday), and setting up the poetry slam. Oh, and homework. Plenty of homework.


'twas a fun weekend, but an eerie ending to it. The power went out tonight at 9 or 10; stayed off for two or three hours. It was strange, walking around campus without any lights. People were out and about; I ended up heading down to Metten to play a game of Cranium in the semi-dark. Things finally kicked on around 12:30 in the morning. Apparantly St. Ben's and St. Joe were dark too, but St. Cloud had power.

It felt sort of post-apocolyptic on the upper campus; apparantly someone ended up starting a dumpster on fire, and lots of people were just meandering around. Oh, and huge snowflakes; almost like snowballs. Some of them were golf ball sized. Crazy stuff.


Bum Wine.com, for all of you Night Train and Mad Dog 20/20 fans out there. This will definately help me out with my schoolwork.


Went on an Arrested Development binge today. Woo!


Another Amazingly cool video.

I'm back to coldish, dreary MN. Had a good trip back, good visit of UCLA, and I found out that harvard turned me down. Boo.

Anyway, back to homework.


My interview at the law firm the other day went pretty well; hell of a firm though. They handle wrongful death and personal injury cases, and they won't touch anything that will run less than 7 figures. Last year the whole firm and their spouses went to Cabo San Lucas for a week. Yeeks.

I visited USC yesterday and liked the school a lot, though the location is pretty urban. It's definately on my short list.

Courtney also took me out surfing yesterday. The water was pretty cold as I didn't bring a wetsuit, but I got up a few times (if only for a second or two). It was a lot of fun. I'm thinking that this summer I'll probably board surf on the little wave days and paddle surf on the big days. Should be fun.


If you're having a crappy day and this video doesn't cheer you up, you are without a soul. Wow.

Things in Cali are going good; got to take a nap on the beach yesterday and saw a guy with 2 live parrots on his bike along with other miscellanay. It's great to be with Courtney again, though a bit boring when she's not around. Tomorrow I have a job interview though, Wednesday I visit USC, and Thursday Courtney and I get a tour of UCLA and we're sitting in on a class, which should be interesting. It's supposed to be rainy for the next couple days though, which is too bad.

Yesterday I also realized that a pretty solid beachside bouldering area is a 10 or 15 minute bike ride away. I climbed there when I came out here after my freshman year at SJU, and if/when I come out here this summer it'll be a great place to hang out. Woot.


The sickness is thankfully clearing up; it's basically been a week of lying low and trying to get better. I've seen quite a few movies over the course of the sickness, (i.e. Broken Flowers, which didn't impress me very much).

Tomorrow I get to fly to CA, woo hoo! I'm excited to see Courtney and to get some sunshine. I'll be able to visit UCLA and USC, which should be good. I got an email from Harvard today saying that they mailed a letter to my NZ address and it bounced back, so they wanted a valid address and wanted me to send them a letter with the correction. At first I thought it might be good, since if they're asking for a permanent correction it means they want to send me more mail, so the letter must be an acceptance, but then I realized that it's probably just something preliminary and isn't a decision letter at all. *sigh*

Anyway, I'm off to class to discuss a 17th c. comic novel. Yippee!


Hope you like the photos from NZ (even though they seem to have messed up the page formatting).

Things have been going pretty well around here; the week seems to have gone by really quickly, which is nice since it means that I'm flying to Newport in a week. I'm kind of sick though, which isn't much fun. Hopefully I'm on the upswing though.

I pulled some more props for the show last night and hung around for the beginnings of rehearsal. I'm still kinda sad I wasn't cast for the show since it would have been nice to be on stage one last time before graduation; being at rehearsal made me sort of miss the whole camradarie of being in a cast. *sigh*

I'm going to go see Kevin Smith (Silent Bob) give a talk at SCSU with Tim and my dear mother this evening; that should be pretty interesting. Other than that not a lot is going on; mainly just combatting my sickness and looking forward to Cali.


Some photos from NZ


I went to the spring play rehearsal last night to take some props notes for it (I'm the Properties Master, woo hoo!); looks like it should be a really fun show. It's strange for me to be a part of a show but not be acting in it; I had a hard time running props for Kiss Me Kate, but this time it should be a little easier. I'm just a little too much of an attention whore to be comfortable working in the wings. It's also odd to think that I won't get to act in another show in college theatre, and that it'll probably be quite some time before I act again unless I find some community theatre stuff this summer, though even that won't be the same. The end of an era, I suppose.

As for law schools, Northwester wait-listed me while Stanford and Yale said no. That leaves Cornell, Columbia, Harvard, Berkeley, and Lewis and Clark still in the air. I'm still hanging my hat on a Berkeley acceptance, since if they'll take me that's probably where I'll end up going. Here's hopin'.

Other than that I'm still staying pretty busy; freelance writing and editing is keeping me fed and clothed, and it's nice to be able to go to work at 11pm while drinking a beer. Courtney has started her new job at a ritzy health club and she's getting some back stage work, so that's pretty exciting (though what's more exciting is that I get to see her in three weeks, yay!).

I've gotten back into an MMORPG (massive multiplayer online role playing game, for you non-nerds) that I played last year. It wouldn't work on my computer for awhile, but then I got it fixed, which may have been a mistake as it tends to consume a good chunck of my time. It's not chronic though, so I should survive.

Anyway, off to class. I'm seeing a play about the monkey trials tonight, then it's speech judging tomorrow bright and early.


Had a good college-ey weekend; went to a good party, had fun at open mic night, sold my body for $20 (plasma), wrote for awhile, stayed up with friends eating pizza and watching Family Guy, went to meetings, played video games, watched movies, cooked, and generally enjoyed myself. Now it's back into another week.

It's odd being at school without having Courtney here; that, combined with the "what am I going to do this summer and where am I going to spend the next three years of my life" issues are putting some stress on things. *sigh* She's landed a new job (and maybe 2) though, so she's keeping busy, and I get to see her in less than a month (woo hoo!).


2 pieces of good news: I got into UCLA and I get to perform some slam poems at an open mic tomorrow. Should be fun.


It's been a really fun weekend, with dead poets society readings and sledding and parties and hanging out and adventures and pancake brunches and all sorts of other assorted nonsense.

I didn't get into Stanford, which is sad since it was one of my top choices, but i guess 5000 applied and 170 got in, so my odds weren't great. I also didn't get cast in the play, so... yeah, that sucked too. Pepperdine accepted me and wants to give me money though, so that makes me feel a little warmer and fuzzier inside.

I've also been making friends with some of the new theatre people, which has been nice as well, and connecting with old friends, so yeah, I guess I can handle things.

Oh, and now with the wonders of the campus network I have all sorts of wonderful new music. Yay.


So I'm back at school, for better or for worse. I have an amazing apartment all to myself (Frank 001 if anyone wants to stop in). It's really good to see all of the school friends again. I've been paddling in the pool a couple times aready and I've been spending some time down at the climbing wall again too.

The tryouts for the spring play are tonight, so that should be fun. I really want a small part that will let me have a good time, get onstage, hang out with people, but not have to kill myself working on it.


I had a really fun weekend this past weekend. Between the sausage party at Tim's and the holiday shindig at Ryan's I was able to see all of the college friends, which was a really good feeling. It was strange thinking that it was the last set of these holiday getherings I'd attend while at SJU. Weird.

I also went to a LARP (live action role playing) game with Fokken, and that was, well, kinda weird. Granted, I'm a D&D player, but in the table-top game it seems like we have a little stronger divide bewtween fantasy and reality, and I think I'll keep that divide there, thank you.

I also got out paddling a couple times, which was good stuff (more details on the other blog).

I'm starting to see why people like cell phones so much too; they're handy little dealies. I'm happy about the no-contract thing though, since it could get expensive quickly.


It's official, I've finally joined the cell phone-equipped. I picked up a no-contract phone from Virgin since Target was literally giving them away. As I really only got it for the purposes of contacting other people and not for them to contact me I probably won't have it turned on very often, but it's there just the same.


Things are still going well back home, Christmas with the family was good and paddling on new year's eve was amazing. New Year's Eve was enjoyable and spent with friends, which is all you could really ask for (aside from spending it with your fiancee, which will happen next year).

I donated plasma today, which went smoothly and put an extra $20 in my pocket. The donation center is on the way from school to the river, which is handy. I'll have to swing by more often. I've also picked up a freelance writing gig which is paying really well, allowing me to start making up for all of the money hemmroging which occured over the New Zealand trip. I also picked up some great teas today, which made me happy.

The rest of the week is pretty mellow, more writing mostly, and then comes the famed sausage party (the last one, boo).